How I Want To Be Treated

The way I wanted to be treated. The article I read talked about autistic people on Reddit talking about how they wanted to be treated and I agree with most of the things they have mentioned. For example, I am horrid with social interactions with new people and I’m as awkward as President Clinton when he got accused of cheating on his wife and he couldn’t lie at all about it during a press conference. To put it bluntly, I’m horrible at it and I’m completely blind to people's tone of voice and facial expressions. People, unfortunately, look at me like I grew a second head and I get embarrassed and it only gets worse from there.

I also love my privacy but people don’t listen to me sometimes. When I say I want to be left alone, I mean I want to be left alone. I am a very chill person so I can’t handle hyper children running around and screaming their heads off. I like relaxing either reading, writing, or just watching youtube. People, though, just don’t have good  common sense like some students at my school. It’s quite annoying when the person I don’t like start talking to me after I said don’t talk to me over and over again.

I’m quite blunt and I’m not subtle when I say something or ask something. It’s not my personality to be subtle and people sometimes don’t like that when subtleness and being tactful is the best solution. I would be a horrible politician and political leader of a party and country; however most politicians are snakes anyway so I don’t mind very much about that. Ah, dry humor. My favorite humor of all time. Insulting politicians aside, I’m not subtle and probably never will be.

Won't You Pledge Too?

Regards,
~ Jacob Klein
 ~ Holley Jacobs

Early Invention Is The Key To Success

Finally!! Those who can assist parents in helping their children recently diagnosed with autism have realized that early intervention is the key to success. I have struggled with spreading this concept from the time Jacob was diagnosed. As a pediatric nurse and a mother, I knew that Jacob was special very early on. This was 1998 and Autism wasn't even a word anyone knew about. I took Jacob to a specialist who diagnosed him with Autism.

Immediately, I went into "mom" mode. I started researching everything I could possibly find on the internet. There was not much information out there then and what was available was horrific. Long story short  - children with this disorder "needed to be put into homes because they would never amount to anything".  Well, that just infuriated me. I would be damned if anyone told me my son could not be absolutely anything he wanted and he could succeed and meet whatever goals he made for himself.

As his mother, a nurse, an advocate; I have worked raising awareness for not only Autism Awareness but more importantly to me, Autism Acceptance. I have a great example of what ACCEPTANCE should be the main priority for those with Autism. I have a small green puzzle piece tattoo on my right hand. Now, mind you, I have many other tattoos but all of them can be covered with clothes if need be EXCEPT my puzzle piece. This was a strategic move on my part. When I  first meet someone, I firmly shake their hand with my right hand. Since getting this tattoo, nine out of ten people will ask me what is means. AAAHHHAAA!!! Gotcha!! The door is opened for me to spread autism acceptance and the miraculous human being that is my son.

Would You Join Our Autism Project?

Jacob and I have been working on a project for Autism Awareness Month. We've made a plan to distribute different types of information in different media forms to raise awareness about Autism. We've been working together on this project which is very exciting for me. I love spending as much time with Jacob as possible.

Some things are assigned to Jacob and some are assigned to me. Other types of information are going to be completed with both of us working collaboratively. When it's all said and done we will have a lot of information for people who have the pleasure of having someone with Autism in their life.

The people we're trying to reach are parents who have just recently found out their child has autism. These parents may be scared, concerned, angry and going through a lot of emotions at the same time. I can remember that day as if it were yesterday even though it was over 16 years ago.

We want to help alleviate some of the stress that parents have especially when there are siblings involved. This can make the whole situation even more worrisome on many levels. Our main purpose is to provide these parents with current credible medical and behavioral information as well as advice, news and stories about others who are in or who have been in a similar situation. However, most importantly we want to give them help. We want them to learn about the autism spectrum and diagnosis itself through objective information as well as Jacob and my personal opinions and experiences.

Steam Heart of Gold

**Vitnir on Deviantart

Steam sent flying through pipes intertwining and interconnecting

Loud whistles and bells make noises as steam pumps faster in the pipes

They keep a heart made out of bronze and copper alive through it’s pain

Through its turmoil and through its happiness and it's depression

They keep a young boys life from shutting down

Keeps it from rusting and decaying through the boy's life

Though… the boy wants it to rust

He wants it to die because he is tired of the neglect

Tired of the abuse and mistreatments of friends and people he knows

He wants it to become cold and desolate

To be scraped and torn apart by scavengers

To be demolished and condemned like the days of steam punk

But soon, he realized he had been mistaken

He should live and excel and improve

Because he knew his steam heart was a heart of gold

And he would always care about others

This is Phoenix signing off.

The Importance of Going To College

The Importance of Going To College

I know for a fact that it's important. You have a statistically higher chance of getting a better job with better benefits, better pay, and a high level of living than people who don't go to college. Also, most of the jobs in the world require a higher form of education than others. Even McDonald's doesn't accept people who don't have a version of higher education. This is taken in account of the higher living costs of today that has about doubled in the past decade or so because of the rise of resource consumption, living costs, and living quality. And the types of yesterday are declining to the jobs of today. Jobs such as nurses, farmers, and metal workers are declining while programming, electronic design, and animation are on the rise.


It seems to show that hands-on are declining while the jobs that aren't hands on are rising. So the fields of today's  jobs are narrowed and more fit for that section then the all-around type of jobs  which has lead to a rise of technical colleges that specialize in certain fields and a lower percentage of people going to 4-year colleges compared to people who are going to technical colleges. So because of hands-on jobs that are declining, people are being laid off because of automated services or businesses going out of business. These people are put on SSI because of losing their jobs and they are given a certain amount of time to find another job. But the problem is because they never learned about this newer jobs and never went to college in the first place or never went back, they are unable to get another job because they don't have the relative information that let businesses hire them.

April Again Is Here - Autism Awareness Month

We have made a video each April for Autism Awareness since 2011. We haven't done that this year. We have bigger plans but I wanted to share my three favorite videos. Jacob and I worked hard on these videos and I am proud to call him my son, my heart, and my soul. He makes me proud every day and there are many days I wonder how I got so lucky to have such a compassionate, caring son. What makes me so special? I now realize that it is not me that is special and I am supposed to help him but the exact opposite, in fact. He was given to me by God because HE is SPECIAL and he helps me on a daily basis. Watching him grow into a smart, young man has been a joy that no one can take from me nor share with me. It is something that only Jacob and I share and for that; 

I AM PROUD TO BE AN ASPIE MOM!!

Regards, 
~ Holley Jacobs

Amnesia Verses Dead Space

I love horror games. There's two horror games that I love but scare me a lot. Amnesia: The Dark Descent and the first Dead Space. If I had to choose the game that I liked more and scares me more, it's got to be Amnesia.

First, the monsters. All the monsters scare me. The water monster specifically. You never see what it looks like and you have to keep from falling in the water or your dead. For example, it was the first time I had played the game and I reached the water monster part. It scared me so bad I almost peed myself. I died a couple of times before I got past the monster. And all the monsters are unique as well.

Second, the atmosphere. It gives you the feeling that you are alone and you have to go by yourself. It is even quite creepy at the main menu. The music plays and you get a chill up your spine. For example, I had booted up the game and the main menu music started playing. I shivered in fear and excitement. I got in the game and at first, the music played. But after a while, it kinda stopped. It freaked me out. I kept hearing noises that weren't real. It truly gave me the feeling that I was alone.

Third, you can't defend yourself. Yes. You heard right. You can't defend yourself. All you can do is run and hide. That's the big difference between Dead Space and Amnesia. In Dead Space, you can defend yourself. In Amnesia, you can't. That's the big reason why it scares me more. For example, I had tried to find a weapon and defend myself. That didn't work out. After a couple times, I realized I couldn't defend myself. It gives you the impression that the monsters are much stronger than you and you can't fight them. And it gives you the feeling that your character is an everyday guy. Not superhero or something along those lines.

Now if you want a game that allows you to defend yourself and it scares you most of the time, choose Dead Space. But if you want a game that requires you to be smart and cunning, choose Amnesia. But I think Amnesia is the better game personally.

Signing Out,

Phoenix

Are They Different....Really?

“Asperger’s syndrome has probably been an important and valuable characteristic of our species throughout evolution.” Tony Attwood.

The term "teenager" can scare any parent.  Imagine if your teenager also had a disability.  People think children on the Autism Spectrum Disorder are different, yet in reality, they are more alike than you can imagine.  Although children with Asperger's children suffer social skills deficits and struggle with sexuality and relationships with the opposite sex, they have similar feelings dealing with parents' divorcing and bullying issues. 

Asperger's syndrome is a developmental disorder that can cause repetitive rituals, obsessions, oddities of speech, such as talking in a monotone, shouting voice or taking figures of speech literally. Teens with Asperger's may have eccentric behavior and inappropriate facial expressions, trouble connecting with peers, and clumsy movements.  Autism affects about one in 5,000 Americans and is associated with normal intelligence for some on the higher end of the spectrum.  Boys are three to four times more likely to have Asperger's than girls.  The teenager with Asperger's lack social skills that affect their behaviors.

They tend to have a high interest in one particular area, such as video games, history, or dinosaurs that they talk about constantly appearing manipulative.  These teens will either avoid eye contact or stare at people, making them feel uncomfortable. They wear what is comfortable instead of style.  They cannot pick up on social cues, lacking the innate ability to read body language, engaging in conversation and turn taking.

Chapter 2 - The Aspie Teens Survival Guide.

When I was younger, I used to be a lot more organized. I used to sort things by type, color, and size when it included something like my video games and things I like. Homework was not so bad till I got older when I would lose paper like people would throw away their change in a fountain. Even now I still have problems but I have preventions in place of that. 

In my IEP, I have a technology assist in it so I can use a computer provided to me to help with organization and with help doing homework. It provides me a lot help then binders, folders, and other substitutes. I am also like the author in that I am a concrete thinker. However I can think abstract, sometimes I just can’t help thinking concrete. The negative part is that I need specific directions on things. Most things I don’t but others I need it. 

For example, like the author’s, when my mom need’s her purse or needs something. I don’t usually know where it is so I ask where. When she tells me, I tend to ask where exactly or close to it. However, I am not always successful in asking or she doesn’t know. The same concept but a bit different from the author is that me and my mom go to the school and talk to the teacher’s and anyone else. I give them a presentation about me and my disabilities and others.  

The thing about tests is that my test studying habits are not good, I tend to not study which will be a downside later in life, but I have trouble with it. I tend to remember information well so I don’t tend to study. Though I acknowledge I need to, I still need to put the effort.  

And I don’t believe in cheating on any scale. I refuse to do so. I don’t think it’s right and it’s not worth the risk. Homework is not a major problem unless it’s on paper, then it will be an extreme problem for me and I will end up losing it. That is this blog post and I believe this was an extremely successful one and informational. I hope you have a good day and a good life. 

Bye bye people.
Signing Off,
Phoenix

Jacob's College Ambitions

Jacob's Thoughts on Exceptional Minds

I am not 17 years old and I am going to be a senior at North Star High School. After that, I want to go to college. My mom found a college that would help me and it's a college that I would love to go. It's a college for people with Autism and they help them learn animation, graphic design, Adobe certification  and more. To be honest, I would love to go. It seems like a great place to go and it can help me with my dreams of becoming an animator. I looked at the website and I feel that I would enjoy my experience there. I admit there's probably going to be classes that I won't understand or like, but I think some of those classes might be necessary to help me. It is located in California and while I am nervous if I was to move there, I think it would be an enlightening feeling. 

It would be an experience that I would enjoy. I feel excited that I have the opportunity to go to a college that can help  me. They have been to several places like Disney, VFX studios, Dolby-Digital and more. Their graduates helped make Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. they take their time with students and most are summer students. Surprisingly, the graduating class of 2014 had 5 students in it. 

Exceptional mids is a technical school that lasts three years, but I think it would be worth it. They have caring teachers that understand the needs of the students and are willing to help them with whatever problem they can solve that can help the student.

I feel that it is the right place for me for several reasons. One, it will help me get the job that I want and have always dreamed of. Two, it can show me a new culture of a state I have never been to while expanding my horizons. And finally, it will be an environment that is comfortable to me and will help me improve my skills in leadership and my social skills.

They don't just help with getting skills for your job requirements. They can help with, as I said, getting you adjusted to a leadership role and to help with your social skills. They are even willing to employ you as part of an actual studio if you can't find a job when you graduate. I think this school would be perfect for me and I will do anything that is necessary to get in. It seems like an all around good school and I hope that I will enjoy getting to meet new people and master my craft. It would be an honor to go to Exceptional Minds. That is what I think and feel about college right now.

This is Phoenix, signing off.

Transitioning from an IEP to a 504 - Part 2

Here we are, half way through Autism Awareness Month. The time has flown by. I have decided to write a little on the schedule for transitioning. I talked about Autism in its early infliction on our children. This led us down the path of what we need to know for transitioning later in life. The transition from high school to adulthood is the most difficult transition, not because of the young adults inability to be somewhat flexible but because the laws DRASTICALLY change during this period. Your child will go from having many rights under both federal and state laws regarding their education to very few laws to assist them or their families. I want to break it down for you so you can see it side by side.

There is a really simple, easy reading paper regarding the transition stage that breaks down each step very well. Transitioning from an IEP to a 504 can be very difficult and confusing. You should prepare yourself and your child early. After you review the article on this kind of transitioning, please see the LiveBinder that I put together to aid in all aspects of transitioning into adulthood. You won't be disappointed. Remember -
KNOWLEDGE IS POWER FOR AUTISM AWARENESS


Regards,
~ Holley Jacobs                         

Click here to open this binder in a new window.

Transition Information Part 2 – The Legal System

High School versus College Education for Students with Special Needs

Many areas change during this time. I am going to go slowly and in depth with the different areas of change. Some of the areas that I will discuss in this and other blog posts include legal obligations, accommodations, the role of the parent, confidentiality, self-advocacy, and school areas regarding studying, tests, and how the time spent in school differs.

I thought before I get into the more complicated parts of transitioning that I would use this post series to show what the exact differences are in relation to high school and college when it pertains to the law. This is important information for any parent and young adult to have because many changes happen during this time that if not prepared for them, can cause serious undo stress. My motto is to be proactive and not reactive. Autism transitioning does not have to be a "bad" transition. With knowledge, resources, and a support system in place, helping your child through this transition of high school to college can be made less painful and confusing for all involved.

LEGAL PRINCIPLES

In high school, the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act or IDEA require public education schools to provide assistance with two programs put into place. The first is the section for children birth to two years old while the second program is for those ages 3 - 21 years old. Under IDEA, it is the schools' and parent's responsibility to help children with disabilities to receive an appropriate education with whatever accommodations needed for them to succeed. Each student is required to have an Individualized Education Plan or IEP that tracks their goals and successes throughout their education in public schools. The US Department of Education explain the IEP for you to familiarize yourself with the legal terminology but for a nonprofessional's understanding of the IEP, Understood for learning and attention issues is a better site. I suggest reviewing each site and then you will have a great base of understanding what an IEP is for, how it should be used, and what should be in the IEP.

What If

What If? 

I love this quote so much and it touched my heart so deeply, I cried when I first read it. It did not come from any site related to Autism. I simply saw it online and it beckoned me by saying - "What If?" - "What If?" - over and over again.

The story started last Saturday early in the morning around 3 or 4 am. I had been sick all week, went to the doctor and received medicine but it was not helping. I was taking Albuterol nebulizer treatments, cough, and cold medicine, and Tylenol, but I was still severely ill. Tony had gone to a friend's house, so it was just Jacob and me in the house.

I was sleeping in the bed, propped into a sitting position so I could breathe a little better, but was woken abruptly when I could no longer breathe. My lungs felt like they had collapsed and my body hurt all over so badly.

I could not catch my breath, but for briefs seconds at a time. It was then, I would take the deepest breath I could to deal with the times when I could not breathe. Jacob's room and my room are at opposite ends of the hallway. I had no way to call out to him. I could barely whisper much less yell for help.

Transition Starting Day

Transition Starting Day

One Word – UUUUGGGGHHH!!!! Anyone who knows me will tell you that I will fight until the death for my child. They will tell you that I am relentless and probably, at times, embarrassing. Other descriptions include doing whatever is necessary to protect him, even if it means moving 1500 miles away from home (dig...) for his education needs or spending hours on the internet finding laws and interpreting them in order to protect his rights, not just as a child who has special needs, but a child...period. I have made him my number one priority since conception and will always do so.

Today was the first “Transition Meeting” at school and needless to say, if you read the first sentence of this post, I would venture to say you may realize that I am a tad frazzled. No need to worry that is for sure, my son will receive services that will enable him to fulfill his goals just as a neuro-typical youth does. I had to fight tooth and nail in Virginia, however, it wasn’t until this topic and meeting that I have had issues in Nebraska.

One would think that transitioning a graduating student into the multi-facet world of adulthood would rate pretty high on a school’s list of “to do” correctly. I am finding that is not always the case, even here. One of my best attributes (ask those who know me) is being resourceful. I have had to be. I don’t have tons of money to afford private school or lawyers to fight for Jacob. I play all of those roles and I do it with pride, love, and the attention that any child should receive.

Last Friday, I had it out with a few members of the school staff and laid it on the table that my child would be receiving proper services to visualize, plan, and achieve his goal of being a video game designer and getting a degree in 3-D animation. He is like me in this way, reaching for the stars at all costs.

DREAM BIG! CONQUER ANYTHING!